I'm feeling rather reflective and thankful today. How lucky we are to live in a country where you can use your voice to say what you want. I reflected back on my days as mayor and all of the hateful comments and things people would ignorantly say about me online- never to my face. They freely posted these things online for all to see and most of the time no one came to my defense, not even me. I often get asked to run for office again, to get involved because I was a leader that could not be bought. When I hear those comments I am thankful and appreciative and for a split second I think to myself, "maybe". But then something happens and I think to myself, "eh, maybe not". A couple of weeks ago, a guy posted negatively about a yoga class of mine, which took me by surprise because so many people give positive feedback about how calming my voice is, how it seems that I put a lot of work into my playlists, and how it's appreciated and enjoyed. His complaint was not about my teaching style or some offensive language, it was complaining about my voice. He didn't like the sound of my voice. I was born with my voice. I was born with my blue eyes, with my complexion, with my hair (yes, it's all natural!), with my smile (minus my 2 front teeth that are covered in veneers as a result of grinding my teeth which is a result of stress and PTSD). And while I would never take advice from this person and his feedback means nothing to me, how amazing is it that we live in a country where you can freely judge someone by something they are born with and not only you can do such a thing but that you feel ok and safe to do so.
I'm feeling reflective on many things of my past because I will be turning 40 soon and I have experienced a lot, I suppose that's why I'm starting to grow wisdom hairs. As I reflect, I'm taken back to a time where we didn't have social media and people were more polite ( I worked in retail, I can have an opinion on that) even as a social worker, there was respect. You could say things and everyone once in a while you would overhear someone say something nasty but now it's a daily occurrence. I dated a guy early 2000's who was terribly abusive, mostly with his words until the end. He also would complain about my voice and annoying I was. The words and the way he manipulated me and treated me really cut deep. I used to wish that he would just hit me because then I would know it was abuse and I would leave (which finally did happen). But up until that point, the words he used to degrade and to control me had me second guessing myself and thinking that I was the problem. I even remember when social media wasn't viscous. What happened that gave people the "ok" to be so verbally abusive? It's become one of those "Why" questions that I am curious of the root cause.
I continue to reflect back on my past and think to my future about how I want to show up for others and also how I want to contribute to society. I don't want to dwell on the past or the future but it's important to study history, to remember history, and to have vision for the future. Not honoring or remembering history can cause a repeat of those past events. It's how we grow, it's how we change. Words affect me differently than years past. It's important to have the map of one's values, one's personal mission statement, one's goals...you don't need to know how to get there or know what it is you want; but, you need to know who you are, what you value, what you tolerate, and how you want to react.
We will be updating our YouTube channels within the next couple of months, adding guided meditations, yin yoga, yoga nidra, and all levels yoga classes as well as cool videos with chill background music. The links are in my linktree>>>> Linktree . If you don't like the sound of my voice, you may not want to check out the YouTube channel 😉.
May you Believe
May you Love
May you Understand
May you Empower
xoxommmmmm
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