Driving to Miami and playing catch up!

I took some time off from blogging.  Honestly, I didn't know what to say.  Rather, I had so much to say that my mind was on overload and I didn't know how to process all of the drastic changes and I found it tough to articulate everything.  If I had a computer hooked to my mind,  I would have published at least 3 books by now.  Any way, that technology doesn't yet exist and I am human.  Now, I am called to my laptop and driven to share as the words and thoughts are flowing with ease, grace, and the need to let it flow.  At one point I thought about shutting down this blog because I wasn't as active as I wanted to be and also because the previous posts are reflections of who I was, not who I am.  After a lot of thought and consideration, I decided to keep the blog and to just "catch up" and then carry on and move forward while keeping the words that illustrated my past because they are very much a part of my future and how I arrived to NOW.  So..my blog posts will be flowing and catching up from here on forward.  

I began the drive to Miami on Friday September 28th.  The number 8 has played a significant role in this journey, during 2018!   That revelation would be a book, or part of a book to explain....Anyway,  I felt drawn to honor the number and decided and planned to start the drive September 28, 2018.

 I was so impressed with Bruiser, he was so well behaved, and made new friends as we made our way to West Virginia...It was also his 1st time in a king size bed...I've always wanted to take him to the ocean and I was making it happen. So surreal. I've always had this vision in my mind but never thought I'd have the courage to actually do it.

 September 28 2013,  five years ago,  my world was rocked and by my own fault, I own it....It was my mistake and my mistake also gave some miserable people an opportunity to try and hurt me, because I was in politics and I was not on their "side" or whatever.  Ah politics, such a vicious beast of thing .  But, it happens and that was their path and their karma. It all happens and happened as it should, we don't know it then, as we go through it: but, I know it now.  I left Grafton that morning at my lowest weight since before politics. I gained 50+ lbs so quickly as my body shut down during the last few months I was in office.  I didn't think I would ever lose the weight.  Now, I only want to wear 2 piece bikinis and I love my body.   Amazing what a couple of years of tenacity, resilience, and perseverance will do!  I am not only thankful for that day 5 years ago but for everything before and after. This year was the year that I let go of it all.  

I let go of that stuff... but I WILL share, it's all part of my story and I want to help others overcome whatever they need to overcome.  As I share going forward, it comes from a place of overcoming and gratitude rather than previous times when I shared it came from a place of wanting justice or a vindication or wanting justice.  I think that is part of the reason I haven't blogged in a while...I was healing and I wanted to make sure that when I did decide to write, it came from a place of love, forgiveness, compassion, and with hope and intention to help others. I am now at that place and while I let go of the anger, bitterness, need for justice and all that, my story still needs to be told.  I am driven to tell my story; but , in a different way.  In addition, as I look back at the memories, I am really proud of myself.   

 We all have to overcome something at some point. Without the downs, I wouldn't be me. I can FINALLY say with 100% certainty that I am my hero, I am my biggest fan, I am my true love, I am everything I am supposed to be at this moment. Dudes and dudettes, life is freaking short and amazing and a true roller coaster ride....Every emotion and every experience is meant to be felt and to be lived fully in that moment.  Embrace it all...good and bad!  Yes, I know...easier said than done, trust me...I know.  I get it!    At any rate, I drove to Florida....just me and my little dog too!  

There was a little traffic as I left Ohio but the scenery was amazing as I came into West Virginia.  Our first planned stop was outside of Charleston ,West Virginia.  I searched and made hotel reservations and a driving itinerary before hand since traveling with a pet can be difficult.  I wanted to make sure it would be a smooth ride and wanted to control what I could control. I'm also a bit picky with where I stay for safety reasons and for health reasons.  The last thing I wanted was to transport bed bugs!   So, I controlled what I thought I could control.   Ha! Control,....something I grasped onto so tightly in the past but grip loosely as I move forward.  How much control do we really have?  None, so just go with it and do what you can.  

 I have found that doing what I can (like planning the route to Florida and making reservations ahead of time) are all in my control but I really have no control over anything.  Going with the flow has been an amazing lesson learned and a lesson that I continue to learn.  It's a lesson that I have been learning so much this year.  I think that is a blog post all on its own, stay tuned!   Like, when my tire pressure on my left back tire kept going down and I had to stop frequently to fill it up with air but found that many stations were out of service or they had a confusing device to use...go with the flow!  I could have panicked and reacted in a non productive way, a way that I probably would have reacted if it was years before...years before all of the lessons learned.   I've learned that panicking and overreacting does absolutely nothing.  Nothing is resolved faster or better when in a state of fear or panic.  It doesn't change anything, so why not just go with it and embrace it.  And go with it is what I did for the most part.  I am human and did panic at first and got the heart pumping but quickly realized, recognized, and remembered that resisting is reinforcing and I didn't want to reinforce any negativity.  

At any rate, Bruiser and I stopped at the hotel in West Virginia, about 5 hours from Grafton, and enjoyed the night!  Bruiser adjusted with ease and had no problem with the king size bed and walks around the hotel.  We didn't get an early start in the morning as it was super foggy. I wasn't in a rush and enjoyed the extra time in the comfy bed with my furry companion.  We left around 930/10 (after figuring out how to fill my tire up with air!).  The drive through the mountains was literally breath taking.  I'm thankful for my time driving through the mountains of Pennsylvania otherwise, I would have been extra terrified.  Anyway, I gripped the wheel and worked the downshifting and brakes with ease while enjoying the stunning views.  At one point I think I was in the clouds and I was surrounded by the mountains that are referred to as the "blue ridge mountains'.  I didn't understand the name until I saw the views.  Oh, that's why they are called "blue ridge mountains".  Absolutely stunning and breath taking, no words can adequately describe the views or the feeling as I choked up several times.  I remember driving through a tunnel and saw vehicles up ahead look as if they were falling off the face of the earth, an amazing optical illusion that made me slow way down and got the heart racing, but left me speechless and in awe.  It was a reflection of my life, bracing myself in anxiety and fear, but slowly moving forward anyway knowing that it was ok and the light at the end of the tunnel was not only near but to keep moving toward it, knowing that it would be ok and that vehicles weren't actually falling off of a cliff.  I kept driving forward regardless of the fear and unknown much like I did with life.  

There was a point in planning this move where I was given the opportunity to fly and to not worry about driving, etc.  It was a gracious opportunity given but it was an easy way, a short cut, an easy out.  I felt like it would be cheating to take such an offer and I've never taken an easy way.  I've always taken the most challenging way because if I decide to do something I want it to be the most challenging way possible, that is where the growth occurs.  I've literally chosen paths, made decisions, and have chosen to go the most difficult route because I am not only stubborn but because if I decide to do something I want it to be difficult so that I am challenged, so that I grow.  Show me a short cut and  I will show you how to kiss my ass.  Give me the most difficult path possible!  Make me grow, throw me to the wolves, break me down, challenge me in every way...that's what I want!  

I was gracious for the opportunity my intuition, my heart, and my soul, consistently "drove' me to choose to drive.  I knew it would be stressful for my parents, sending their first born daughter away on the road for a long drive to move 1100 miles away so I did all I could to keep in touch with them and to ease their minds.   And I was no doubt meant to drive this journey, with only what fit in my car as everything else was sold, given away, or thrown away.    I knew that driving this journey was part of my journey and I didn't want to take any short cuts.  It was a fairly short drive to our stop in West Virginia.  I am thankful for having the knowing, curiosity, and intuition to make the next stop in Savannah, Georgia.  I had heard so much about this beautiful city, and it was on the way....why not make it a stop on my way to MIA? As I continued to move forward, I understood my decision and everything made sense.  Next stop, Savannah!