B.L.U.E. (Believe Love Understand Empower) is a way of life. It's something I thought of back in 2010 and something that came to fruition and evolved in 2017 through my holistic health coaching education and certification.
I implement these principles at work, in my relationships, and my own continuous self improvement.
I strive to always look at the causes of issues, whether it be with difficult people, facing obstacles and challenges, or in working on my own health issues, personal development, and spiritual wellness. Knowing and understanding the cause of any issue is crucial to treating it.
Recently I saw a dermatologist for a skin rash I have had all summer. I was concerned that it was serious and wanted to rule out skin cancer and such. I also wanted to know if it was viral or bacterial. Turns out it is eczema. I asked the Nurse Practitioner, "What is the cause of eczema?". She stated that it is unknown but she has free samples of creams and lotions that she can give me as well as a prescribed topical ointment containing steroids that would help. I declined all of the above because I want to work on resolving the issue holistically and figuring out the cause. I have found that diet and environmental factors, and stress can be a factor.
recently I was presented with an opportunity. Without going into details, I went into a situation with a perceived difficult person thinking I would be stern and direct and end the issue. At first I was frustrated and wanted to execute a black and white one-sided resolution. After listening to this person speak, I began to think to myself, "What is causing this person to act this way?" I continued to listen and I asked some questions. Over a period of listening and trying to understand this person, I realized there was an underlying issue that was causing this person to act out and behave in this reactive manner. I began to understand this person's behavior and decided to not go through with the reaction that I had initially planned. Together we discussed how to move forward in a productive manner, I provided this person with a couple of tools and we agree upon a plan on how to resolve the issue.
The above may sound (read) vaguely but the point is this...Everyone is fighting a battle that we don't know about. There is always a cause for someone's behavior. A lot of time it's easier to just dismiss someone's feelings and to act in the best interest of yourself. Listening with an open and curious mind is the best way to finding resolution for both sides. I have a better understanding of this person and have a better understanding with how to move forward in a way that is beneficial to us both. Listening is so important. So often we react and we are quick to judge.
Now, I know 100% that this doesn't always work. There are people that you cannot and will never be able to reason with, regardless of how much compassion and patience you show. And in those cases, it's best to just not engage with these types of people and to walk away. I think that in most cases, listening and understanding with compassion will work.
Believing, loving, understanding, and empowering is a way of life for me. It's also a continuous improvement, cyclical, process. Listening is a crucial tool to utilize when navigating difficult situations and difficult people.
Believe Love Understand Empower
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