One month "Til 34

One month and I will be 34...34 years of age.  34.  Wow, 34.  I remember thinking that 34years old was old, and here I am ......about to turn 34. People have said, "The 30's are the best years of your life!", "Welcome to the thirties! It's a blast", blah blah blah.  Courtesy of facebook, I imagined myself un- alone at 34.  Most of my friends are married with lots of kids.  Some people have gone through 3 serious relationships since I've been in my 30's and I have had none. 

I think my expectations for 30 was too high.  I thought for sure I would be in a serious relationship by now, if not married or at least have experiences in a good relationship.  I'm a professional bad -relationship seeker.  Too gullible....the guy who thought he was G.I. Joe and then told me he was dying, later I found out he was a bonafide, holy shit,  sociopath.  Oh gawd, and the dude with the broken femur and unforgiving hatred....oye! There are so many mistakes to name I can't keep track.  All driven from that, "Oh, here's my prince charming, he's the guy this time I can feel it.  He'll protect me. He's going to make everything ok". ..."He's going to save me".....  See what I did there?   Come on Megs, really?  And people wonder why I'm so elated to see my dog, Bruiser at the end of the day!

Here I sit, 3 college degrees deep.  My work experience is unparalleled and I have been fortunate to have received further training in various fields, certifications from six sigma to social work to my tow motor license.  Yet I feel like I have accomplished nothing.  I'm going to be 34!  I'm going to be 34 and I have nothing to show for it.  Shout out to all of the narcissists, sociopaths, assholes, and mismatched adventures, right?

I don't even know how to date these days.  Hi, my name is Megan will you fill out this psychological assessment for me?  How is your relationship with your mother?  Do you wet the bed, start fires, torture animals? 

All joking aside, I'm going to be 34! thirty freaking four!  Almost 40!  I got nothing.  There's gotta be more than 34.  Yea....that's it!  There WILL be more than just 34.  I feel like I should give some advice or something but I got nothing.  Time goes by so fast and before you know it 34 sounds like a fabulous age.  Things may night bot be all sunshine and rainbows but I have a vision.  And 34 will be hardcore!  (eh, I can still rhyme! "Lol")